I wish I had fur so being naked would feel less awkward… I like kids, it’s the adults I have trouble with… From now on I’m using the word ‘intense’ as often as possible. “How’s the deadline looking?”, “it’s looking intense.” “How was your weekend?” “It was intense.” “How are you doing?” “I’m intense.” It makes the most mundane activities sound like an extreme sport… Everything said in Spanish sounds delicious. When someone talks to me in that language I feel like telling them that that sounds yummy but I’m afraid of pissing someone off that can talk faster than me. Especially if it’s a woman… Super heroes spend major portions of their life trying to fit in and be normal. If that’s the case, they forgot to give me superpowers. I’ve considered throwing myself into a vat of radioactive liquid but apparently you have to bypass several layers of security to even get near one… I was told global warming is a hazard to human life and is endangering life on Earth. I ran the heating with the windows open. To my disappointment nothing happened. I’ll have to re-think my strategy if I wish to destroy the human race… Someone said that there’s no intelligent life in the universe, I told him that’s a very bold statement for such a little man… When things go to shit I like to remind myself that I’m on a rock floating through space and somewhere along the line humans will inevitably die out. Maybe that’s why people act so busy so they don’t have to think about the handycap the insignificance of their size poses in light of the universe. If you think about it, it’s hard for anybody to be a somebody, especially if you want to feel important…

Wow, blog! Thanks for listening! It’s great to have a friend like you.